dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
