Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I wish i was in the wii world.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize