Whats the glycemic index on semen?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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