nut hugger
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Randomize