More tranny stories later!
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
