I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
