ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
