you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
