belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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