Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
