You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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