on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
