Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
