There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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