did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
