Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
