Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
