More tranny stories later!
People in love make me want to vomit
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Thank you for not boning my boss.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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