Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
if i can run in heels then i can drive
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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