i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Randomize
