I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
