I wish life had little blips of pornography
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
