weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
