still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
