Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
