Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
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