there was a trapeze. enough said
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
