Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm going to jail i love you
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Randomize
