also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
