Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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