is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
