we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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