i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
he fucked my hip out of place.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
He better not be in your backpack
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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