umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
