i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
where am i from again
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
