My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
