I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
