You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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