So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
