I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
