Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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