Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Randomize
