Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Randomize
