Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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