Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
