He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
