I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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