Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
All the doctor said was why
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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