Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
