They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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